The hellish road to who the hell gives a toss: A bowl of bitchy and the power of words

Wow what a week of ups and downs this has been. Following my post last week I was on a high which lasted all the way to Thursday morning. Divine and I did some boxing on Tuesday which was great - we even got a video clip of it (in which I looked like a complete doos, let me just say!). However as Newton or some such bright spark said, what goes up must come down. And boy did my mood come crashing down on Thursday! Gosh! Divine was sick and had to miss our training session, leaving me to do my thing by myself - which in ordinary circumstances would have been hunky dory, but I wasn't particularly motivated. I then made the horrid mistake of giving in and getting on the scale after training. I am so frustrated I cannot even tell you! Details will follow later! Yes I know that I started off quickly and it had to plateau at some point. Yes I know that muscle weighs more than fat. Yes I know that it was bound to happen and I even said in previous posts that it was coming. Yes I know all of this, but patience is not my strongest virtue and I want results and I want them right frikking now. I had trained 10 out of the previous 14 days. Hard. I had also been really good about eating properly (except for one little cupcake. Ok fine, and a bloody birthday donut. But I really can't always say no thank you - and if two little cheats are going to reverse this whole process then I am going to end up a basket case!). Although I am allowed 3 cheat meals a week, I have literally been averaging 1. One. Uno. And then I end up so riddled with guilt that I skip until I can't anymore. So excuse me for being a grumpy bitch about this.

So on Thursday, and feeling decidedly out of sorts, I took a walk to the shop in search of solace. And where does a woman find solace? In chocolate. Stop making groaning noises. Immediately! I ended up buying a "diet" chocolate. Worst R8.99 I have spent. Ever. It tasted like that old budget chocolate Easter egg you hid in your undie drawer as a kid and forgot about until you moved out years later and, muttering to yourself "chocolate doesn't go off, nom nom nom", you gobble it all up. And then end up dry heaving over the loo. Yeah, like that. Don't. Do. It.

Friday was honestly even worse. Steve worked until 3AM so I took the kids to school - meaning no gym. The sacrifices one has to make! Geez! My mood was horrid. Talk about drowning in self-pity! Time to get the hell over myself and deal!

Friday night included a moderate intake of wine and tequila - elevating my mood hugely! :D And luckily the rest of the weekend was also pretty good. On Sunday I went to gym, to make up for the Friday missed session. Something which really appealed to me - and which made hitting the gym on a Sunday morning totally worthwhile - were the words I saw on a fellow lunatic's shirt: STRONG IS THE NEW SKINNY. I know right? How brilliant is that! I have absolutely got to get myself a t-shirt with this on. Love love love it!

So taking these words to heart, I am going to make a concerted effort to change my crappy attitude and my ridiculous expectations regarding results. When complaining about the "lack" of results, my bright spark colleague, Debbie, piped up, "Now you are just being greedy". And perhaps she is right. On Sunday evening I decided, over a glass of wine, that come Monday weigh-in, whatever the results are, it's fine. I know I am working really hard and, if the results don't change or even go up, then, quite frankly, oh well!

And all too soon Monday, the bitch, hit with a bang! The results are as follows (just a reminder that I am giving you total results from first weigh in to now simply because it makes me feel better!)

Weight: - 12.1kg (a loss I can indeed smile about).

Chest: - 8.2cm (a perfectly respectable loss of back wobble and, unfortunately, boob)

Upper arm: - 2.6cm (which is a fabulous 1.1cm less than 3 weeks ago. Soon I will have to rely on Red Bull to give me wings!)

Waist: - 15.7cm (yes, for those sparky people paying attention that is in fact a gain of .1cm. Must be the cupcake!)

Thigh: - 6.8cm (this figure still gives me the biggest thrill - it is an additional loss of 1.1cm since last weigh in - all those squats and skips paying off clearly).
Hips: We finally, finally, finally have a change in measurement. Remember we have been having moerse changes in clothes, but not actual buggering tape measure stuff? Well today is a loss of 2.1cm around el arso and hipsicles!
Calf: -1.7cm. Again, I am happy with this figure. I have "hilly" calves after all - which in reality means that they are not up and down, but shapely and rounded. They are also pretty much solid muscle. On this subject, I also, according to the all knowing Divine, have teardrop muscles on my upper legs - something highly sought after apparently. These are a blessing (because they show the strength in your leg, but also give your leg a really nice shape) and a curse (straight up and down legs look thinner, clearly.)

So what does it all come down to?